The Next Adventure

 For over a year I have worked in downtown Houston, fought the traffic 22 miles both ways, and found a thousand new things to try and do in the city. I've made new friends and gone new places. Living in Houston helped me figure out who I was by myself.

Time to turn the page.

Today I ran a million errands and climbed up and down flights of stairs more times than I can count. At the post office, I changed my mailing address to a zipcode that doesn't belong in Texas for the first time in my life.

For the last time, I turned out of the driveway of my Houston apartment complex and headed up Dairy Ashford.

An enormous part of my life happened in Houston. So much history here, and yet I am more than excited to leave it behind.

Because I have learned to be an adventurer.

 Living in Houston taught me to embrace each phase of life for what it's worth and embrace it to the fullest. When it's time for that phase to end, be excited about the next.

For the last two months, I've been able to see old and new friends one last time before I move away from this state. Knowing I didn't want to look back and think I'd rushed off in a hurry, wasting the remaining time I have in this phase of life with these people, I was careful to cherish my farewells as much as possible. It would be a lie to say I won't miss my family and friends in Texas, because you have all contributed to the richness of my life.

I love all of you and will most certainly miss you.

But I am excited for the next adventure in life. Words fail to describe.

You see, my person is currently six states away from me. And in less than 48 hours, for the first time in the 5+ years we've known each other, we will no longer be "long distance."

Tomorrow morning, bright and early, I will leave my favorite state in the world and drive till I reach the place where the rest of my life changes forever. Behind me, my family and friends and countless, precious memories; in front of me, my person, new friends, and countless, precious memories yet to be made.

Farewell, Texas. Until we meet again.

{An Abridged Version}

For those of you who just recently heard about my upcoming move and have no idea what happened or what's going on, here is the (extremely) abridged version of the story. Also, I will be updating this blog to stay in touch with my soon-to-be-very-distant friends and family members about the adventures ahead.

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David Personius and I met in high-school speech and debate. He lived in the DFW area, I lived in the Houston area. We've known each other for more than 5 years now and during that time, we sort-of-not-really dated long-distance for about 5-6 months after graduating from high school, parted ways for 2 years, and reconnected over New Years 2013. We've been in a much longer-distance relationship since late January. (If you want the full 8-volume edition of that story, feel free to ask me about it in person sometime; it's a really cool but extremely long story.)

Facts you should know:

Grounds at my new apartment

- David is currently in training as a Green Beret (Army special forces) and has about 1 year of training left before he will be stationed for four years
- He lives in Fort Bragg, NC, I currently live in Houston, TX. If you don't have a map handy, just know that's six states of distance between us.
- Long distance relationships are the pits. After 5+ years of being 4 hours to 6 states apart from David, we can definitely testify to the validity of this fact.
- In the last six months, David and I have seen each other only twice (excluding FaceTime and Skype). 4 days in February (when we made our relationship Facebook official) and 3 days in April.

Given the distance, time, and military factors between us, David and I very much over this whole long-distance thing. In mid-April, we started talking about the idea of me moving to NC to be closer to David but I wasn't sure I wanted to up and leave my family and all the friends I've ever known in Texas. Two weeks later, at the end of April, I was able to fly to NC and see David for a few short days. We talked more about the idea of me moving but I wasn't sure it was even possible and I still was uncertain about leaving my friends and family.

All it took was getting on that stupid plane again for me to make up my mind. By the time the 4th state had flown by, I had decided that if there was any way it could possibly be worked out, I was going to move to North Carolina.

That Sunday night, I talked to my parents about it and they shared their approval and support of the idea.
Monday: I talked to my boss about the possibility of working remotely from home in NC.
Tuesday: My boss confirmed that I could keep my job and my benefits (which were at risk of being lost) and work from home.
Wednesday: David and I casually browsed apartments online.
Thursday: David visited a prospective apartment on my behalf and my application was approved by that evening.
Friday: The lease was in my inbox ready to be printed, signed, and notarized.

In the space of a week, I had a job and apartment in NC and the moving date was settled for July 4th.

A wise pastor once told me;

"If something is God's will, it will happen. If it's not His will, it won't happen."

By the end of the week, it had happened. I won't bother you with the details, but everything fell together so perfectly that David and I were fully amazed every step of the way. God is very gracious and generous -- I'll leave it at that.

That's the back-story.

Right now, I'm just plugging away at work and waiting for David to get back from SERE (Survival, Evasion, Resistance, Escape), which is essentially POW training. You don't want to know what they're doing to him and even if you did, I couldn't tell you because nobody's allowed to say anything about it.

David is due to get back on Friday (the 7th) so I'm pretty stoked to get to talk to him again. #understatement We haven't talked to each other -- not even letters -- since May 20th. This business of David being "off the grid" for weeks at a time is another reason we were motivated to look into the idea of me moving to NC.

The plan for July is that David will fly down to Texas before the move and help with the 17.5 hour drive. My family is driving with us in their truck with my bigger furniture and will help me get settled in as well.

Armed with enough caffeine to give the energizer bunny a heart-attack and 300+ country and classic rock songs on the iPod, we intend to drive straight through the night and get to my apartment in NC by lunchtime on Friday (July 5th).

And YES. To everybody who has asked, I am very excited about this but will miss my friends and especially family like crazy but I still want to move anyway. And no, you cannot convince me to stay.

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Feel free to ask any questions in the comment section! More exciting updates to come as moving day approaches and a whole new phase of life begins.

The Practice of the Presence of God

Ever find yourself wondering exactly what to do with this mess of a world we live in? Politics are disintegrating more and more every day, the economy has less stability than quicksand, and morals are almost forgotten. Representing the name of Christ under these circumstances can be a daunting endeavor.

During my quiet time yesterday, I was pondering the overwhelming burden of maintaining spiritual purity and striving towards becoming more like Christ when the world around us seeks to squeeze the life out of us. Over the last ten years, the world has exploded with corruption on every level of morals, dragging standards down with politically correct terms, attempting to mask and justify their horrifying sins. Our uphill battle for Christ has grown exponentially steeper.

Many Christians have been forced to retreat to the basics. 

The weaker believers are crumbling under the intense pressure and others are wondering how to protect themselves from the same dilemma. Although I have grown up as a Christian, I myself find it hard to keep from becoming weary. Through the thick fog of putrid darkness that surrounds me in this worldly place, I glimpsed a flicker of light and tasted the beginnings of a new strength. 

"The Practice of the Presence of God" was written by Brother Lawrence, a 17th century French monk who discovered the simple answer to a complex world. After becoming a Christian, Brother Lawrence explains that he made a decision to 'practice the presence of God' every moment of every day. This is not something that comes instantly; one has to work at it. Yet he testifies to the incredible fullness of joy and peace he experienced walking through every moment of life in the knowledge of the presence of his Savior. He fell in love with the One who Created him.

The concept is so brilliantly simple that I was stunned.

When you love someone wholeheartedly, you will gladly give whatever it takes to be with them. You will do anything to prove your love and for your Love. You delight in every moment spent in fellowship with that person and nothing can spoil your joy. No challenge is too hard, no trial too difficult if it means being with the one who has your heart. Devotion comes naturally. Love, in it's purest form, is abundantly fulfilling.

How does one fall in love with another? Common interests, time spent together, and a deeper knowledge of that person.

Who more perfect to fall in love with than the only perfect being in existence?

1 John 4:19 says "We love Him because He first loved us." We don't have to get God's attention, we don't have to look beautiful, we don't have to stand out, we don't have to 'make' him love us. He loved us first.

He wants us to spend time with Him and get to know Him better. He wants nothing but our love because out of love, everything else comes naturally; obedience, service, loving others, etc.

Instead of worrying about the security of the government or the state of the world's morals, Brother Lawrence focused only on his love for God. He talked continually to God in his heart and worked to maintain a constant awareness of God's presence. As a result of the relationship, he began to live life entirely on faith.

What does it mean to practice the presence of God?

Brother Lawrence states simply; "My day-to-day life consists of giving God my simple, loving attention. If I'm distracted, He calls me back in tons that are supernaturally beautiful."

He expresses the fullness of his joy in this way: "Although I beg Him to do whatever He wishes with me, He does nothing but caress me. This is what being in His presence is like."

I think I have finally found my answer.

Forgetting shattered dreams and old wounds, setting aside all fears and concerns for future plans, my goal in life now is simply to practice the presence of God. I'm taking my relationship with my Lord and King to the deepest possible level.

In the words of Brother Lawrence, "I'm not anxious about my purpose in life, because I only want to do God's will."

If I'm going to spend eternity with the one who gave me that gift, I'm going to make the most of my time here on earth getting to know my Love. I encourage you to do the same.